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Male Masturbation
Euphemisms
201-400
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Closet Frisbee
Closing the deal
Clubbing Eddy
Clubbing the baby seal
Clubbing the clam
Clubbing the dummy
Coating Prince William Sound with love oil
Coax the cajones
Cocking some soup
Cocking the rifle
Collecting a specimen
Combing the hair on your bald pig Sally
Combing your hair
Coming to grips with the situation
Coming to grips with yourself
Committing mass spermicide
Communicating with Red Leader One
Communing with nature
Conjuring Up A Rain Slicker
Conking the Cardinal
Consulting with your silent partner
Converse with Harry Palm
Cooking the cream of cock
Cooking with Wong
Corral your tadpole
Corralling the tadpoles
Cough your filthy yogurt
Crab tease
Crack off a batch
Cracking off
Cracking the bat
Cracking the fat
Crank the love pump
Crank the Shank
Crank yanking
Cranking
Cranking for cum
Cranking one off
Cranking the monkey
Cranking the shank
Creaming the banana
Crimp the wire
Cross-Examing the Witness
Crown the king
Crushing pop cans in the dark
Cuddle the kielbasa
Cuff the carrot
Cuff the governor
Cuffing the dummy
Cuffing the puppy
Culture the American Blood Sausage
Custer's Last Stand
Daisy-chaining
Dancing in the dragon's fiery breath
Dancing round the maypole
Dancing with Johnnie One-Eye
Dancing with the one-eyed sailor
Date Miss Michigan
Date Mrs. Palmer and her five daughters
Date Palmala Handerson
Date Rosie Palm and her five sisters
Dating Mother Palm and her five daughters
Debating the Albino Newt
Debugging the hard drive
Decongesting the weasel
Defrosting the fridge
Detoxifying the puppy
Devil's handshake
Dick whacking
Diddle
Diddle whacking
Diddle yourself
Diddling the dinky
Digging for change
Digital penile oscillation
Digitally oscillating one's penis
Dilly with the willy
Dinging the dong
Discharging the heat-seeking moisture missile
Discipline your soldier
Disciplining the primate
Discovering your own potential
Discussing Uganda
Dishonorable discharge
Disobey the Pope
Disseminating
Distributing free literature
Do handiwork
Do it your way
Do the Dew
Do the janitor thing
Do the white knuckler
Dogger Bank
Doin' a loner with your boner
Doin' extra credit
Doin' the Hand Jive
Doin' the solitary rhumba
Doing a hand job
Doing an impression of Goofy
Doing battle with the Purple-Helmeted Warrior of Love
Doing it your way
Doing the five-knuckle shuffle
Doing the hand jive
Doing the hand-cooter
Doing the janitor thing
Doing the knuckle shuffle on the ol' piss pump
Doing the plotkin
Doing the pork sword jiggle
Doing the sin of Onan
Doing the Skin Limbo
Doing the White Knuckler
Doing your homework
Doing your own thing
Dong flogging
Donkey Spank
Doodle your noodle
Downing at the club (for members only)
Downing the pitcher
Downloading from your own website
Dra en handtralla
Drain Charle's Dickens
Drain the dragon
Drain the monster
Drain the vein
Draining the dragon
Draining the main vein
Draining the monster
Draining the one-eyed monster
Draining the poisons from the building
Draining the vats
Drip the pickle
Dripping white-hot coconuts from the veiny palm tree of lust
Driving the skin bus
Drizzle the squid
Drop off a load
Droppin' a wad of hot wax
Dropping a line
Dropping stomach pancakes
Dropping the kids off at the pool
Drubbing the dolphin
Dry humping the ottoman
Dry-Firing the Turtle
Dry-firing your musket
Duking the Bishop
Dundering the devil-dolphin
Dunking the dolphin
Dusting the old trophy
Eating grapes with the one-armed man
Eberting Siskel
Educating Peter
Electing the President
Empty the cannon
Emptying your sex pistol
Encapsulate your probe
Engage in safe sex
Erupting Vesuvius
Escorting the one-eyed postal worker out of his denim cell
Evacuating Tatooine
Evacuating the Bomb Squad
Evicting the testicular squatters
Excercise your rights
Exercise one's right
Exercising your right to privacy
Express yourself
Extracting some crack spackle
Facha la manuela
Falling in love with your right hand
Fapping
Fastening the chin strap on the helmet of love
Faxing Jimmy Dean
Faxing the Pope
Feed the ducks
Feed the fist
Feeding bologna to the Smurfs
Feeding the chooks
Feeling your way around
Fencing with the pork sword
Fertilizing My Comforter
Fetch the bagel dog
Fetching milk
Fiddle the flesh flute
Fidget with your digit
Fight the Champ
Fight your turkey
Filling Charlie's magic sock
Finding yourself
Fire the hand cannon
Fire the Surgeon General
Fire the wobbly warhead
Firing off a round
Firing the flesh musket
Firing the love rifle
Firing the pound gun
Firing the presidential staff
Firing the Surgeon General
Firm your worm
Fishing for the two-toned trouser trout
Fishing for zipper trout
Fishing with dynamite
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Male
Euphemisms
• 1-200
• 201-400
• 401-600
• 601-800
• 801-1000
• 1,001-1,200
• 1,201-1,400
• 1,401-1,600
• 1,601-1,800
• 1,801-2,000
• 2,001-2,114
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